Life at Twenty

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This here is a special story,  not because it involves my life which is definitely not the most interesting life there is, well I am quite an interesting character so to say. I don’t really think of myself as that interesting but yes here I am. Enough with the manifestation, so after the students strike at our school that got the sophomores and juniors suspended for the rest of the year, I got myself back at home in Kisumu kano. Now rural life can be a little tricky especially if you weren’t psychologically prepared to spend your entire year there.

With just my PC and a speaker, I was set to find enjoyment and seclusion at my room which apparently is called “jikon” even after me protesting that its my house. Well I don’t live with the rest of the family in the main house since I come from a semi-traditional luo family and a man my age shouldn’t be sleeping in their mother’s house. Yes, I don’t sleep in my mother’s house (jokes on you), but the house is still hers anyway. So anyway, my PC is all I got for entertainment for I’m no big fun of remote wars with my younger sisters,  especially when Maria is airing on citizen television and I want to catch up on The latest episode of Mixed_ish. My parents are not really tv fanatics, I mean my dad will watch whatever is on the screen as he waits for the nine o’clock news bulletin. My mom on the other hand sneaks into her bedroom after supper to go through the scriptures and read those Pepe Minambo books I get her each time I go for book exchange affairs. Those that talk about greatness and the key to success.

I spent my first week binge watching and eating, you know, catching up with the rest of the family in terms of the kilograms I am expected to weigh as son of my mother [giggles]. I come from a big family [pun so intended]. By the end of the week I got bored watching the damn television series over and over with the heavy down pour and not to mention the great depression in my pocket. Well I can afford occasional data that is majorly for research and YouTube.

If you know me then you know I paint and I love art. I spend a lot of time on the screen watching and reading art related materials, but then even that bores sometimes. So, I get myself veering off and watching just any video I come through on YouTube. First, I did watch a lot of product unboxing and review videos, then car reviews and some TEDx shows. I even watched Hellen DeGeneres or whatever she’s called. Thank God I didn’t look up the Khardasians.

When everything on YouTube seemed so repetitive, I just sat there for a while thinking there to myself what life really must be like in your early twenties. Then, Boom!! I typed, ‘life in your twenties’ and the videos I Saw were majorly on relationships and how you should live your life at twenty. You know stay single and travel and I don’t know what. A lot of white stuff. Ati travel… kwani mnadhani kutravel ni rahisi tu hivo? Then there were those that focused most on building relationships and whatnots, my intellectual level can challenge Burale’s currently so mtu asiniambie.

Honestly, I think being twenty is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. The pressure to do well at school, maintain friendships, expectations from the society to see a role model and not forgetting relationships! Whew! I really don’t know when adulting begins but I think this is it.

That constant feeling of doing right and doing more drives you insanely crazy. Lying in bed isn’t fulfilling any more like it used to be during my freshmen year. The fact that your peers are a year ahead of you thanks to the flawed system angers you even more. You do freelance writing here and there scrapping a few coins every week, you feel happy that you don’t ask for airtime money from your parents anymore.

The people around you feel that you are just on the right track and that you seem to have figured out yourself and life early enough. You sit there wondering what they see in you that you can’t quite envision.

You are a struggling artist; you spend every dime in buying art supplies. You struggle to find a niche in this crowded market place. People who appreciate art are very few in this country. You are divided between continuing your writing career and your love for fine arts.

You’ve curated and mechanized a way of avoiding relationships at all costs but your hormones just won’t let you be. You like this girl who likes someone else instead for that’s destiny’s way of outlining things. You dread conversations with her because you don’t want to be attached to an unavailable girl. But do you care? You still talk to her anyway.

Slowly you are trying to evade the social life, you ghost a few people online and even switch your contact but still end up giving it out. You are a man of the people, you are so outgoing you can’t just ghost people, especially those you love.

You believe you are in the right path to finding purpose and happiness in your twenties.

 

I am beginning this series called “life at twenty” for those who just hit twenty years and those in their early twenties. If you want to share your expectations and experiences of life at twenty feel free to share your story with me through owangwesley@outlook.com or text me on WhatsApp  : + 254 704 888 540 

 

 

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